fear might be the death of me.

[theohhellos]

The days went on and on. Each spent in eternal solitude. Isolated from the world. They still held hope that Tricky would try to visit them. That he would find a way to break them out without being noticed. It would've been so much easier if- No. No. Aediculus used their trust to lure them into this trap. He wanted them here. They couldn't afford to trust him again. They just couldn't.

After awhile, they don't expect anything anymore. Maybe it's been months now. Months and months and months of-

The doors slide open.

Their head turns quickly to look, praying foolishly for someone else, but it's... Aediculus. It's Aediculus standing in the doorway. Their teeth grit and their hands clench at their sides. He looks worried and that hurts. How dare he. They didn't want to see that look on his face. They wanted Tricky. Only Tricky. They try to look around him, to see if it was with him, but it isn't. It isn't there. Why aren't you here?

But maybe it was better this way. Right? If Life knew Tricky tried to see them, then something bad would happen to him. And it'd be their fault. So. It was good that Tricky wasn't here. It was good. ( They try to convince themself this was true. )

Aediculus tries to get their attention. Tries to tell them that he had no idea that She would put them in here, but they won't listen. The refuse to. They want to yell and scream at him, they want to run out the door and leave this place. But they don't. They don't do any of that. "...Just go." Is the first and last thing they say to him, after months of nothing. They can see him hesitate. Then swear to figure something out. But they don't believe him. Then he leaves.

The door closes.

And they stay.

Alone again.

. . .

The garden is big. They spend hours exploring. Doing nothing but their job. That's all they could really do. The eye on their forehead shows them endless streams of different timelines. Showing them what needs to be done and how to do it. Red strings making those things happen. This hurts. But IT does not care. She does not care. No one cares. They stumble after that. No. Tricky cares. He cares about them. He always did. That wouldn't change.

Breathe in,
and out.
In
and out.
In
and out.

They try to focus on something else.

Something shifts.

...This wasn't supposed to happen.

Something feels wrong, and they don't know why. They look around until the eye on their forehead shows them something new. And wrong. So, so, so wrong.

They don't understand how they can tell, but they see- they see another Fate. They see them with Life. And they look scared. They look hurt. Something happened. Something so very bad happened. Why are they seeing this? How are they seeing this? Their head hurts as things shift again. A red moth is ripped from their body, from another Fate's body, and that body crumples to the ground. Then the body is disposed of.

Breathe in,
and out.
In
and out.
In
and-

Sob.

It hurts their throat but they really couldn't stop if they tried. Sob after sob tearing out of them, eyes wide in panic, in fear. That was- that wasn't them, but it was. It was. Could've been. Might've been.

Were they going to die?

How was that fair?

What did they do to deserve something like that? I just wanted to help, I just wanted to help.

But Life calls them selfish for it. For rejecting the job they were given oh so graciously by Her. Shouldn't they be thankful? You wouldn't end up like that if you just listened, Fate.

They're scared. And confused. Why didn't this happen to anyone else? They never saw this happen to any other God. Why them? Why? That wasn't fair! That wasn't fair! And they scream.

And no one hears them.

They needed to get out of here. They needed to- do something.

And reality shifts and changes.
And the doors open.
And Fate finally runs.